Wednesday 30 April 2008

Enjoy the Silence

A number of years ago (2001 I think) I signed up to what was then called audioscrrobler (now the corporation known as last.fm). The theory was simple, you install a plugin on your favorite mp3 player and for every track you play, the plugin will send the details back to the central server. Then a number of statistics are complied, you can compare your taste to other users but more importantly, you can see what you've been listening to over the months, see the top ten artists, albums, genres etcetera.

Here's the problem, after a few weeks I got bored of and stopped using it but I neglected to remove the plugin. A few months after that a friend suggested I use this service as it's so great! I told him I've already signed up and showed off my profile, not realising that it had been running in the backgroud all this time and I have to say I was in for a bit of a shocker.

Number one by far was Nina Simone, no surprise there, I have a number of her albums and love her music. Number two one the other hand, made me step back a bit, it was MeatLoaf. After, rather embarrassingly admitting to liking Joss Stone, I'm proud to say that MeatLoaf is great! Number three was a bit weird, Evanescence, a Christian (I think) rock band and their first album blew me away, it got air time at least once a day back then.

Looking at the list, I see Metallica in between Aretha Franklin and Ella Fitzgerald. I see Moby, REM and Shakira (in that order). Eric Clapton, Dead can Dance, Michael Jackson even Joy Division got a look in. My friend looked at me shaking his head. I didn't, until then, know the full extent of the randomness of my taste in music (I call it eclectic by the way). People need to know that there is more out there then just pop so why not, every now and then, pick up something that you've never heard before, you might just like it.

Exploding Batteries

I bought a laptop in 2005 and a few weeks after buying it, I got a nice letter from IBM telling me that some of their batteries may have be defective and could explode if I misused it, used it or even try to charge it! So, they directed me to a website where I could type in my serial number and if the battery was found to be from the “effected batch” I would be sent a replacement and should immediately stop using it.

Surprise surprise, my battery was one of the potentially explosive ones and I should only use the laptop with the battery removed. I thought “it'll only be a few days, they obviously care about my safety” so I disregarded their instructions and continued using it. A week past, no battery, no explosion. Two weeks past, no battery, no explosion. In fact I've been using this 'tainted' battery for the last three years now and I've heard no pop, sizzle or bang from it. Let me tell you the adrenaline rush I get every time I turn on this laptop, knowing that I take my life into my own hands is unparalleled!

Ok, so I exaggerate slightly but there's a subtle point to be made here. I received an email from my former boss this morning telling me that the replacement has arrived! I had pretty much given up hope but it's finally here. I would like to say that I'm annoyed at IBM for taking so long but I have to say, it couldn't have worked out better, I get about twenty minutes out of this battery now and was going to buy a new one anyway........ thanks!

Tuesday 29 April 2008

Tasted Like Chocolate Never Tasted Before

I had a Flake today. I took a bite, held the wrapper waiting to catch the crumbs (to be saved for the end game) but this time I noticed didn't get as many crumbs as I used to. That is to say, I can eat the entire bar without making too much of a mess. Don't get me wrong, not making a mess and maintaining your dignity does have it's benefits but, in my opinion, the best thing about eating a Flake was pouring the crumbs into your mouth after.

So is it me or are Flakes flaking less? Have Cadbury, in their infinite wisdom, changed the crumbliest, flakiest milk chocolate to be less crumbly and flaky? I can't understand why they would do that as their entire marketing campaign is based around the fact that the Flake flakes! In fact, at one point, they even suggested that you would have to eat the Flake in a bath as it would make such a big mess (that's my interpretation of that ad and I'm sticking to it!)

I shouldn't take a stab at Cadbury's marketing team as they do seem to know what they're doing, they are currently using Joss Stone as their spokeswoman. It was a truly inspired strategy to use a flake to sell Flake.

Sunday 27 April 2008

Kids on Planes

A few years a ago I was in the Canary Islands and had a very mild cold, I wasn't even sneezing but my sinuses were blocked, I couldn't breath through my nose. I did what any reasonable person would do, I took some anti inflammatory tablets so I could breath. I problem was, I then chose to go diving (I know you shouldn't dive with a cold but it really was a mild one).

So as I was thirty meters bellow the surface, playing with manta rays that were a massive nine feet wide but seemed to move with the grace of Baryshnikov. This is were the trouble started, I didn't know this at the time but the nice anti inflammatories I took were wearing off, now this leads to the air (due to the depth, it would have been about four times normal pressure) that was currently in my sinuses would be stuck there! At this point, I start to come back up and as the air expands, the pain starts. I was a little uncomfortable but, in the grad scheme of things, it wasn't too bad, so mu so that I completely forgot about it until the next day when we were flying back.

As the plane climbed steadily to however many thousands of feet a plane climbs to, the pain just above my nose became worse. I felt like I was going to explode, I would have gladly paid somebody to stick a hot poker up there just to relieve some of the pressure. All of this would have been fine if it weren't for the five year old in the seat behind me who thought it would be really clever to scream at the top of his lungs and kick my chair constantly!

I did the only thing I could think of, I stuck my head over the back of the chair and gave the kid the meanest look I could muster and it worked! He went silent and stopped kicking, in fact he didn't start kicking until we were landing and I was so overjoyed by the fact that the pain was starting to go down that I said nothing.

I was reminded of this painful event on Friday when, on a plane, a baby was screaming her head off! This time, armed with a not so mean look (the pain must have helped me that day), my plan was to turn around and look the father in the eye. I turned and was faced with a small baby, making drool bubbles, looking back at me. She then smiles and I'm gutted to say I was completely disarmed by this, what could I do? I sat back down and just let it go. The baby cried from time to time but I was clearly powerless. I still trying to get over the fact that a baby with no motor skills could have such a calming effect on me, I fear maybe I'm just getting old.

Friday 25 April 2008

Stalemate

I've been living here for over a year now and, unfortunately, I still have some unopened boxes, things that need to be unpacked. This is not just out of laziness, it's more the fact that the things inside the boxes don't really fit anywhere. Don't get me wrong, I have plans for the stuff, there's a box of pictures that I will one day open up, pick a few and get them blown up to hang them on the wall.

One of the boxes has a night sky globe (a throwback from my 'astrophysics' days) which would look great on a small table in the corner. I don't have a small table in the corner so that stays boxed.

I have a number of coffee table books which I could casually pick up from my coffee table and flick through them whenever I feel the need to look intelligent (yes, I read! What of it?), unfortunately, I don't have a coffee table.

Digging around, looking for something, anything that I could liberate, I stumbled upon an old chess board. I think it was a birthday present from my parents, it's rather nice, the board is mirrored with frosted squares and the pieces are glass (clear and frosted).

Now, I haven't played in years but maybe that's just because people don't walk in, see the board and say “hey I didn't know you played, shall we?” So this is now the plan, find somewhere where I can place it so that I can finally liberate it from the stacks of boxes and maybe even play a game. The only problem is where? I'll give this plenty of thought before finally making the move......

Tuesday 22 April 2008

Needles

http://www.blood.co.uk/

Firstly, apologies to anyone that's squeamish, this isn't too bad and I don't go into any gory details. Also, I know I've mentioned it before but I thought it was worth a second mention.

Today, for the first time in over nine months, I went to the blood bank, not to take out a loan but to make a small deposit. Over the years I've seen friends and family go into hospital for way too many reasons to go into right now. I know this is going to sound like a complete cliche but some of them would not have walked out of hospital if it were not for the fact that someone, somewhere said “go ahead, stick a needle in my arm”.

To this day, I still have to look away when they stick the needle in but the rest of it is pretty straight forward, there is no pain! I can't stress this enough, this really is a 'zero effort' thing to do. So visit their website, give them a call and book an appointment, it takes no time at all.

Maybe someday, you or somebody you love has to rely on a transfusion, if this happens then, most likely, there is no alternative..... pay it forward.

Remote Madness

I enjoy a good riddle, I like thinking, I find it keeps me ticking over and I love problem solving! Every now and then I'm faced with something that just leaves me scratching my head without even a hint as to where to begin. Usually this slowly drives me insane until someone points out the obvious and puts my mind at ease (after a few hours of kicking myself.)

So, here it is, I live alone, I have no maid (as is evident by the state of my flat), the flat is fairly small. I leave for work in the morning and come back in the evening and in-between, I can be quite sure that no one has been in. So how on Earth am I able to lose a remote control? This, to me, seems almost impossible. I put it down somewhere and it really should be there when I look for it.

Thankfully, the remote isn't for a 'major' appliance, it's for the small iPod dock I have sitting in the corner, I rarely ever use it but now I'm thinking if I did, I would have to get up and select the next track like a cave man! I guess I just shouldn't let it bother me but it does, I can't stop wondering where it could have got to.

Anyway, for now, I'm just going to carry on as usual and hope the pixies that hide things choose not to torture me anymore. Although the more likely scenario is that I slowly let this consume me until a friend pops by and asks “Why do you have a remote in your fridge?”

Let's see how this pans out.

Monday 21 April 2008

Photo Booth

I was going through a load of old boxes (I've been here for over a year now and still not fully unpacked), looking for something that's not overly important anymore. I stumbled on an old photograph, you know the type, it was taken in a photo booth, four pictures in a strip. I figure I must have been nine at the time and it was a school trip to France, it cost us ten francs (that's about 1.5 Euros in 2day'z spk). The memory's a bit vague and I can't even remember my friend's name but we walk in a take four different pictures and then wait five minutes for it to develop, it looked like fun.

Fast forward x years to the last time I had to take a passport sized photo (I think it was for a ski pass but don't hold me to that). You sit down in the booth, look at the birdy and wait, one flash later and if you're happy with it, click 'ok' and out pops a print with four copies of the same picture (one in each corner, it's not even a strip!)

It's all digital so how hard would it be to have the machine take four pictures and print them out, there's no reason why the pictures have to be the same! Technically, it'll cost exactly the same to print four of the same or four different ones, so why not have this feature in modern photo booths?

The cynic in me tells me that this is because, if you wanted four different pictures, you would have to pay four times. I remember, out of shear boredom (or amusement), we would make a small visual 'story strip', it was good fun and I really believe that the kids of today are missing out on this simple pleasure. Bring them back I say! Call me a dinosaur but aren't people saying things like “let's give the hoodies something to do”? I'm not saying old-style photo booths would help tackle the hoody/loitering problem but, at the very least, it would give me something to do.

Saturday 19 April 2008

Eye of the Tiger

After an incredibly long and tiring week at work I want to do nothing other then sleep. I'll be very disappointed if I wake up before 2PM tomorrow but we all know what they say about the best laid plans..... I'm turning into a bit of a workaholic, although I've yet to cancel on anyone because I “have an emergency and have to work late” I still can't seem to switch off.

Anyway, I was looking forward to this weekend, not because I have any plans but because I haven't had a weekend to myself for months now. On the way home today, I popped into a friends place and watched Rockey 3, good mindless fun, no need for thinking at all! It still scares me to think it was made in the early 80s very much before my time but still a very good cheesy film loaded with almost as many one-liners as Top Gun.

So, the point (it's a very small one) to all this is to bring your attention to the song 'Eye of the Tiger' by survivor, next time it's on the radio (what station are you listening to?) or pops on your iPod, listen carefully. One of the lines state 'the last known survivor dunks his bread in the night', all the lyrics sites have it wrong! The song is all about raising to the challenge and beating your rives again and again. Naturally this will make you hungry and what survivor are saying here is that once you've won, once you're the last guy standing, no one will judge you for breaking that age old tradition and dunking your bread into soup. I'm sure they encourage putting your elbows on the table in 'Somewhere in America'.

Thursday 17 April 2008

Celebrity Endorsed Fragrance

Usher, David Beckham, Vicoria Beckham, Jennifer Lopez, Celine Dion, Sarah Jessica Parker and at this point I could not be bothered to think of any more so I jumped on to wikipedia, the entire collection of all human knowledge. The list isn't small!

So, what's all this about, is this the fragrance that the celebrity wares or is it that the celebrity smells like that fragrance? I guess this is one of thous things about modern living that I just don't get! What can I say, it's been a long day and it's not yet over, I guess the last thing I expect is to be inundated with adverts assaulting the senses as much as the product they are pushing!

Just a small gripe today, I'll aim higher tomorrow.....

Wednesday 16 April 2008

I Know Nothing about Politics

With May the 1st creeping up on us, I realised I know precious little about the candidates or what they stand for, so I set myself the task of writing at least one line on each.

How is it that the only serious threat to Ken Livingston's reign at the moment is Boris Johnson! Don't get me wrong, I like Boris Johnson, he's hilarious (admittedly not intentionally) and he's great for a sound bite, I would love to invite him over for dinner. But as a politician, good God no!

I don't often believe the hype of opinion polls but look at the other candidates:

Richard Barnbrook, now I just can't vote for the BNP, it's their logo...... it shows no imagination what-so-ever! All I'm saying is hire a good designer, sort it out and then I'll entertain the idea of criticising you're politics.

Gerard Batten, London is geographically part of Europe (I've looked at a map and it's true!) and to thrive economically, we've really got to work with our neighbors. Granted this is more a criticism of the UKIP then Batten, yes I agree that a country should be politically independent but not to the extent they are suggesting. Membership in the EU is expensive but in the long run, it will be beneficial.

Sian Berry, I'm all for the Green party but realistically, she's highly unlikely to come close to getting the number of votes needed to make a change.

Alan Craig, well not a lot I can say about this one except that I think his priorities might differ, ever so slightly from mine.

Lindsey German, nuff Respect to her! It was to be said, her heart's in the right place, but her recent split from unity (or not split depending on which way you look at it) doesn't exactly fill me with confidence.

Winston McKenzie, tho I like some of his ideas and he really does have the right attitude, but this is the whole point, he doesn't stand a snowball's chance in hell.

Matt O'Connor, he strikes me as a bit of a realist and like anyone who's central (politically), I strongly agree with some parts and strongly disagree with others.

The last three.....

Brian Paddick, I would vote for him but “a vote for Lib Dems is a wasted vote”. I'll keep an eye on this one because come 1st May, it may well be worth wasting my vote.

Ken Livingstone, is he red or purple now, I can never remember. I'm for the congestion charge, I think it has made a difference but like a lot of his policies, they really need a lot more thought put into them, I find Ken will gladly jump onto a bandwagon for a vote. I don't like 'U' turns, I need to know my candidate will stick to their guns.

Last but, by no means, least, Boris Johnson. I'll keep one eye on the sky and if I see a pig fly, I'll cast my vote in his direction but for now, dinner's an open invite, feel free to pop over any evening!

Please note that this post is more an attempt to learn rather then to criticise, that being said, feel free to tear into me, that's the whole point of democracy.

Monday 14 April 2008

A Great Idea for a Blog

Today, another weird conversation in the office. One of the guys was making toast as I was spreading a huge globule of peanut butter when someone pointed to the jar of Vegemite on the shelf. “What's the difference between Marmite and Vegemite?” As the question was left hanging there for a few seconds, I thought “nows a good time to throw my two cents in.” So, if you're a big fan of either Marmite or Vegemite but have no idea how it's made, stop reading right now, you won't thank me for it.

Both Marmite and Vegemite are what they call 'yeast extracts' common by-products of the beer making industry. In plain English, they take the scrapings from the bottom of the beer barrel after they have finished making the beer, jar it all up and..... that's it! Yes the stuff I love to spread on my toast would have been disposed of as a 'hazardous chemical' until some bright spark thought “we could market this!”

So, explaining my theory which is in no way based on any facts. I said that Vegemite is sweeter than Marmite because, in general, Australian beer is a lot dryer than English beer, so it stands to reason that at the end of the brewing process, there would be more sugar left over in the Australian by-product then the English one. To me this makes sense. At this point, one of the guys ventured “you really should write your musings down on a blog or something, they are so random!” I laughed so hard I almost wet myself, I had to point him to this page....

There-Their, There-Their

Something that may be self evident by now is the fact I can't spell to save my life. I mean that quite literally, if I was ever in a situation where someone had just spilled their entire plan for world domination and placed me on a conveyor belt heading slowly towards a circular saw and the only way I could stop it all was to spell out the word 'synonymous'. Ok, far fetched I know, but if that did happen, I would have no choice but to come out with a cliche like “Do you expect me to spell?” and brace myself.

I went to a state-funded school and was pretty much written off as 'being a bit dim'. We were once given a verbal reasoning test and I remember seeing the look on my teacher's face as she read my exceptional score. My parents were called in, 'words' were had and I was sent to an educational psychologist for an evaluation. She reported back that I'm not a little bit dim, I'm dyslexic.

The next few years were a complete nightmare, now you have to bare in mind that as a kid, anything that singled you out in any way was not good, the other children will pick on you. I had to see a specialist once a week, was given extra time during written exams and carried a spell checker with me to most classes. Sure, I took a lot of stick from everyone else but I knew I understood the concepts being taught and with the extra help was now more able to express that fact.

I'm very reluctant to use this as an excuse, in-fact the only time I usually mention it now is as a joke. But it's still there, I look at the screen and just can't seem to pick up misspelled words or errors that just jump out at others. I guess, over the years, I've just gotten used to it. I tell this to some of the teachers I know and they say I was very lucky to have this picked up at a very young age, most of the time it just gets ignored or the child is labeled as being a bit slow. The teachers I know seem to take a keen interest in their students and I do hope that's more the norm and not an exception. It's worrying to think how many children are sitting in classrooms with teachers who have given up on them. They may not realise their full potential simply because they think they are stupid and no one will take the time to reach out and show them they are not.

Also, I don't have an editor so these posts pretty much go out raw.

Sunday 13 April 2008

I'm not Evil, Just Misunderstood

Well it all started at a dinner I went to a few days ago...... “You're Hindu aren't you?” she says, “Well, tho I was raised a Hindu, I'm pretty much an atheist now.” went my reply, “Oh..... I see.” she says in a rather disappointed tone, slowly looking away towards the more interesting conversations going on at the table.

This isn't all that uncommon a reaction, I've found that regardless of how religious people are, a lot of them seem to equate being an atheist to being without morals or just plain lazy. People talk about taking a 'leap of faith', accepting that there isn't any evidence of a higher power but people will still take that 'leap of faith' and choose to believe. To they are being courageous, taking a risk as they are consciously choosing to believe and live their lives according to that choice.

I don't think it works that way, the vast majority of people I know were raised with religion in their daily lives, where the existence of God was never in question, religion (and the acts of religion, like praying) were never questioned, the only thing that was debated was how much they choose to follow it. At this point is it really a leap of faith they're taking? Does it take courage to do the same thing they've always done without question? Is it really a choice?

If you're one of the people raised that way then surely it would take a leap of faith to choose not to believe, to choose to go against the grain as it were. It's not out of shear laziness and it's not the 'easy way out'. It takes as much courage and effort to not believe as it would to believe.

It doesn't get any easier after that point either, I've often thought, it would be great to have the comfort of Heaven or the threat of Hell to give reason for the choices I make. To play devil's advocate, a deeply religious person chooses to be good so they can get into Heaven, not go to Hell or avoid the wrath of God. I, on the other hand, have no reason to choose to be good, surly I'm living a life without consequences and therefore I must be evil.

It surprises me that people I've known for years still equate no religion with no morals or ethics. To me that's as crazy as saying anyone that is religious is also ethical, which is just not true. I only have to point to any number of religious fundamentalists that are more then happy to kill or torture in the name of God.

In essence, I'm not a bad person, some people would even go as far as to say I'm a 'nice' person but as I try to tell them, this has nothing to do with my faith or lack thereof. Do try to bare in mind that a person can choose to be good without the threat of eternal damnation.

Friday 11 April 2008

Zippy

I was going to talk about something that happened last night over dinner as it went a long way to proving that I probably shouldn't be out in polite society as I have great difficulty biting my tongue. Unfortunately, I'm about to head out in a few minutes and just don't have the time to put that drivel/rant/thought to paper.

Instead, I'll make a quick mention of nicknames. I'll start by saying that my real name is not Josh but no one ever calls me by my first name except my family (once a month maybe?) and an ex-girlfriend (even tho she insisted I use her nickname).

I've been called many things: H, George (no idea where that came from), 'boy', Jwash and of course Josh. However, last Christmas, one of the guys from my office summed it up perfectly. We were out for a meal and a few drinks (ok, it might have been a smidgen more then a 'few') and I'm sure I must have been doing my usual thing by criticising something or someone. The guy just looks at me and says “wra ra ra ra ra ra” (doesn't work very well on paper but he was trying to sound like Zippy), cue roaring laughter from everyone around, it wasn't so much his impression, it was more the fact he had totally summed up the way I criticise and for the first time in a very long time, I was completely speechless!

Anyway, since then, the name has stuck and as of this morning, I have yet to come up with an appropriate comeback, the words “wra ra ra ra ra ra” stop me dead in my tracks.

Wednesday 9 April 2008

Nice Guys Finish Last

I've been told this time and time again, apparently I'm never going to get anywhere unless I become more blood thirsty. This usually baffles me slightly as I'm not exactly a walk over, sure I don't seem to have the same hunger to own a Porsche or make oodles of money before I'm 40 as a lot of people around me do, but I'm happy!

At three points (that I can remember) in my career, I've been presented with either going into a well paid job at a large company with a pension or going taking a less well paid job with a smaller company but with more control over what I do and with more flexible hours. Each time, I've picked the smaller more flexible jobs and I've (to-date) never regretted it. At one point, a friend even asked me “do you want to be poor all your life?” which has to be, by far, the most bizarre question I've ever been asked as I paid for dinner that night!

I'm sure at some point in my life, my attitudes will change and I'll start chasing big payoffs and maybe even sell my soul (if anyone will buy it, that is) but right now, I love my job, have many friends and am keeping up with the mortgage, in short, I love my life!

More recently, I was told “nice guys finish last” while talking about relationships (I don't envy the relationship this person is in but that is a whole other story), and I realised, I don't really care, I'm not going to change who I am, take it or leave it. For now, I just don't feel like racing........

Tuesday 8 April 2008

A Slightly Embarrassing Secret

Let's get this out of the way, I don't have a driving license. Yes I jumped on the bandwagon with all my friends when I was old enough, sat my theory test then just let it expire. Moving forward 2 years, I thought “It's about time I grew up and got a license”. So, again, I sat my theory test, took a number of lessons then proceeded to fail my practical over a number of minor errors. I took some more lessons then failed again and again and again. Yes, that's right, I've failed my test four times!

Anyway, this brings my saga up to 2001, I was in university and would pick up the occasional shift as a security guard (it paid well and thankfully, I never had a serious incident). I had picked the short straw and was working a night-shift on new year's eve, it was in a retail park and I found it to be incredibly boring and uneventful so I decided to take a stroll (do something or go insane would be the general rule of thumb for these shifts) to the local BMW showroom (it was 4am, everything was closed and there wasn't much to see). So pressing my nose up against the window, looking at all the shiny new motorbikes they had in store, I thought back to my dream of owning a bike as a kid, wondering when I gave up on that dream.

After a bit of reading I figured I would need to sit yet another theory test. Once again, I passed! Booked a number of lessons and sat my motorcycle practical first time round (it was snowing as well) and by March that year, I riding around on my first bike!

Now, I'm thinking (and not just because it's freezing out there) it's probably about time I faced my demons and take my driving test again. After a bit of cramming last night and absolutely no preparation for the 'hazard perception' test, I walked out of the test center this morning after ten minutes with a nice certificate telling me I have “two years to book a practical”.

So there it is, my bother-in-law is a driving instructor and I've failed so many times it's a running joke amongst my friends but I have high hopes.

Monday 7 April 2008

Homage to the Thai Man

As I walk in the bitter cold, keeping my head down and hands in my pockets, I make my way to Goodge Place where, day in, day out, an impromptu food court springs up. I was going for one reason and one reason only, Simply Thai.

Unless you choose to have lunch at 1130, you'll only have three choices, red yellow or green. It really doesn't matter which one you pick as they're all great! I usually get there past one and the queue (even on a freezing day like today) snakes around the corner, but believe me, it's well worth the wait.

Yes, I know this is shameless advertising but I'm not getting anything for this, I just think this is an amazing place to get a simple lunch that's reasonably priced. If you work around that area, pay homage to the Thai Man, I promise you won't regret it.

Fava Beans and a Nice Chianti

Just got home and found Hannibal is on right now, it's great movie with some memorable moments and an excellent score. It made me think “can anyone but Anthony Hopkins play Dr. Lecter?” Brian Cox was first to attempt it in Manhunter. Although it was a good film, it didn't really hold a candle to the book 'Red Dragon' on which it was based and although Brian Cox did a good job, I didn't get the cold, calculated psycho feeling from him.

Then, of course, came Silence of the Lambs, when the world was properly introduced to the caged man that's ofter referred to the number one villain in Holloywood. The Antony Hopkins/Hannibal Lecter marriage is one of the few moments from Hollywood where someone made a genius casting choice, no one else could play the part! It's very much like Cathy Bates/Annie Wilkes or Jack Nicholson/Joker, silver screen perfection in my opinion.

Something about him just turns my blood cold, I'm not quit sure what, maybe it's the nonchalant way in which he commits his crimes or maybe it's the clam way he talks, showing just the tiniest hint of the genius hiding beneath..... Either way, I'm going to raise my glass of Chianti to one of the greatest literary characters and the guy who created him, Thomas Harris.

Ta Ta,
H.

Sunday 6 April 2008

Knight's Move

I wake up every weekday morning, amble into the living room and turn the TV onto the 'Hits', wait for my eyes to adjust to reality then get going with the whole waking up thing. Throughout the morning until I leave for work, music videos are playing in the background, its nice. Every now and then, amongst the monotonous 'music' on, I stumble upon something that makes me smile, not because the the music is mind blowing but usually because the video has me in stitches. I'm referring to Something good 08 but the Utah Saints. Memories of MC Hammer and thous parachute pants come flooding back.

I remember the first release, it wasn't anything special but was a nice tune. What I didn't know at the time was the main bit was sampled from a Kate Bush track. Cloudbusting isn't amazing (don't get me wrong, it's good) and didn't become a classic, but the video is certainly worth a watch. The familiar looking chap in it is Donald Sutherland who is also in the rather watchable Dirty, Sexy Money.

Over the years, I've missed out on water cooler classics like Lost, Heros, the last 2 seasons of 24 (staring Donald Sutherland's son) and a whole heap of other dramas simply because I'm rarely ever home during prime time. When something new starts or I hear someone raving on about a new series, I find it difficult to watch it, this goes doubly so if it is actually good. Going from past performance, I start watching something but then miss an essential episode, even in this day and age with reruns and +1 channels, I will end up missing something. I get that weird feeling that collectors get when they don't have a full complement of something (marbles I hear you say? Bare with me) and frankly that ruins the rest of the series for me.

So, although I've bought myself around to committing to a travel card, I can't seem to do it for a TV series.

Friday 4 April 2008

Chicken! No No No......

Most of my friend (their are very few exceptions here) think that Nandos is the greatest thing on earth. I would have to disagree, I think the problem (if you can call it that) stems from the fact that they specialise in chicken and I find chicken to be on of the most boring foods ever! Quite often someone says “try this chicken, the flavors really come through” to which I have to say “it's the marinade you're tasting you crazy fool!” Chicken is pure texture and has no taste.

I liken it to a manufactured band, let's take Girls Aloud as an example. Yes they are nice to look at but they have no talent. Their voices go through numerous filters and synthesizers, they don't write their own songs or music and none of them are naturally good looking. What's left? I'm tempted to say “texture” but I think that too would be pushing it.

Don't get me wrong, this isn't an out and out attack on Girls Aloud, they (or at the very least the people around them) have done a very good job marketing them and pretty much convinced the world that their is substance there. No, this is an out and out attack on chicken, be they factory 'farmed', free ranged or corn fed organic, the subtle differences in taste they exhibit is blitzed by the marinade it is covered in or the sauce you have with it or even the lemon you choose to squeeze over it.

Back to Nandos, what is the appeal? Sure the peri-peri is nice, desserts aren't really anything to write home about, ok the olives loaded with garlic are fantastic but that's about it. All in all that makes for ok, nothing special. This makes me think that maybe I'm missing a trick here, I can't get worked up about Nandos the same way the vast majority of people I know seem to do at the drop of a hat.

So, someone...... anyone, please help me but explaining what all the fuss is about.

Thursday 3 April 2008

Blinking Romance

I was flicking though the channels, waiting for some friends to come over before heading out to dinner today and True Romance was on. It's been a while since I last saw it but I think it's a brilliant film. I remember watching it as a 13 year old for the first time and thinking how romantic it was that a guy would kill his girlfriend's pimp. No I didn't have a depraved childhood, look past the violence, it's quite a romantic thing to do.

Anyway, I was only able to see the first half an hour of it but I started noticing something I've never notice before. I think Clarence, the main character, suffers from schizophrenia which would put a slightly different twist on the whole movie. I'm going to have to get it on DVD and watch it again.

Just before we left, 5 news came on with (I had to google this as I usually switch off at this point) Asha Tanna. Yes she's quite attractive, but that's not important right now. Watch the first ten seconds of that clip, she blinks 9 times! It's not annoying so much as it's distracting/hypnotic, you just can't look away, she can't stop blinking!

Wednesday 2 April 2008

Not Filling the Void

This comes from a conversation I was having in the office this morning, it made me realise that I'm one of the very few people I know that doesn't have any fillings. It's not because I watch what I eat, I don't. I down coke on a regular basis, drink coffee by the gallon almost completely saturated with sugar. I eat many, many bars of chocolate and I never skip out on dessert. So why, after all these years of dental abuse, do I still have a full set of working chompers?

It's not just about teeth, starting to work out after a long absence from any sort of physical activity, I find my cardio is still half there, sure I'm not as healthy as I could be but I've been told many times that if I don't keep it up, I'll go downhill in no time. After almost a year of not doing much (it doesn't help that I have the most comfortable sofa ever!) I'm not the wheezing, coughing person I was expecting to be, not that I'm complaining mind.

Where does that leave me? True, I'm not an athlete in any way shape or form but I think little things like not catching the bus to and from the tube station or walking through Oxford Street weaving in and out of the slow moving traffic that is the vast majority of shoppers. It all keeps me on the edge (at least that's what I choose to believe), naturally I have to face the inevitable, this can't last forever but if I keep exercising and generally overcome my need to be lazy at each and every juncture, I think I can't push it back for many years yet. For the time being...... if you see me coming, make way! =)

Tuesday 1 April 2008

Charity Begins at Home

I've just finished reading Three Cups of Tea. As my commute is now only 20 minutes each way, it's taken me almost a month to read but that's not important right now. The story is an inspirational one, about a climber who promises to build a school in a small village in northern Pakistan. He then devotes the rest of his time to build schools in that region, to bring education where it would not ordinarily be available.

This guy, Greg Mortenson seems to be on a mission to bring schools, education and health care to some of the most remote and inaccessible parts of the world and has won the hearts and respect of the local people as well as people back home in America. It's a lovely tale that must be read, if only to remind you how small your problems are in the grand scheme of things.

I've done (relatively) a little bit of charity work but I find it amazing that someone can be so moved by a cause that they commit all the time and effort they have to that cause. What's more amazing is the perseverance he showed at the beginning when no one else seemed interested and there was no money, living out of the back of his car, but working constantly towards that promise he made.

Not every one has the character, the patients or the tenacity to do what he did but you can make a difference, there are numerous causes in and around London that are begging for volunteers, this is a good place to start. Or if that's not your thing, give blood, little things like this can and do help.